December 28, 2019

“Trauma Tips” for Self Love and Relationships

This is a list of monthly “trauma tips” from a trauma specialist to help you reduce the effects of trauma and chronic stress on your life so you can live from a place of healing, hope and happiness.

Healing from trauma is a different process for each person. As a trauma-focused therapist I never tell my clients to do anything that I haven’t tried or use regularly in my life. I have learned over the years through experience, research, feedback from clients and insights from other professional’s successful ways of healing emotional wounds as well as managing persistent stress.  What I share with you here is both cutting edge and tried-and-true techniques for healing.

 Trauma Tip #1

Relationships are so critical for good mental health. The 5 Love Languages Book by Gary Chapman is a good book for couples to read to better understand how each communicates and to decipher their love language (how they give and receive love). This book has been helpful to many of my clients as it seems to give them the language that couples need to better be able to express themselves with their partner.

Activity- buy the book, identify what love language you are and share that with your partner. Make a game out of it and ask your partner to guess what love language you are. Be playful in practicing what your partner needs from you in light of their love language. Be curious and observe how they respond to your attempts at responding to them from their love language category. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts

Trauma Tip #2

Have you heard of the vagus nerve before? The vagus nerve is like an information highway. The vagus nerve helps the brain and body to talk to each other. The vagus nerve is constantly telling our brains how our body is feeling. Sometime we need to pause to sort out what our bodies are telling our brains. Watch this cute short video discussing the vagus nerve. Learn trauma-informed concepts on how to take care of your mental health.

Watch this video, Emotions and the Vagus Nerve- video and learn how:

  • to regulate emotions using mindfulness
  • the vagus nerve affects our emotions
  • stress is related to long-term health

 Trauma Tip #3

Adaptogens are herbs that help us to adapt to stress by restoring the biological capacity to cope and respond. They are also called “metabolic regulators” because they help us to adapt to environmental stressors. I try and incorporate adaptogen herbs in my diet daily or with supplements to help reduce the “stress load” that is common in everyday life.

Here is a great smoothie that can help! It has Curcumin (Turmeric) in it which is adaptogenic and a good anti-inflammatory, making it helpful to reduce pain, depression, and stress.

 Fruity Turmeric Adaptogen Smoothie from the book The Good Mood Kitchen


½ c. frozen pineapple or mango
1 fresh banana
1 c. milk (hemp or coconut milk)
1 tbsp. coconut oil
½ tsp. turmeric, fresh
½ tsp. cinnamon
½ tsp. ginger, fresh
¼ tsp. ground black pepper
1 tsp. chia seeds
1 tsp. green tea powder (optional)
¼ c. goat yogurt (optional)
1 tsp. raw honey or 10 drops of liquid stevia (optional)

Directions: Add ingredients to a blender in the following order: frozen fruit, banana, milk, oil, spices, and remaining ingredients.

 Trauma Tip #4

The Spiral Technique– is a visualization that is used for stress management. It is a method for working with trauma in the body and transforming some of the stored trauma energy that gets stuck in our nervous system. Click the link to listen to an audio that I recorded to help you with this visualization. It is quick and easy to use! Children and teens like this technique too.


This information is provided by Lemecia Lindsey, LICSW. Lemecia has dedicated her private counseling practice to helping clients heal from trauma. She specializes in EMDR therapy, Neurofeedback and is an Integrative Medicine Mental Health Provider.

*This list is not a substitute for medical intervention. Consult with a doctor to decide what is best for you.